Gottman s 4 Horsemen Explained criticism Defensiveness Contempt Stonewalling

Valentine’s Day Sale 50% OFF Digital Relationship Advice; https://stan.store/RelationshipAcademy. Tele-Health Available in the state of Pennsylvania, and Intensive sessions might work for you if you’re able to travel: https://mainlinecounselingpartners.com/marathon-counseling/. ➡️ Here is your free printable Time Out Cheat Sheet: https://BookHip.com/WNXMHVD. . Gottman’s 4 Horsemen lead to divorce and separation if you don’t do anything to stop them. . . This video walks you through each of John Gottman’s 4 Horsemen (Criticism, Defensiveness, Contempt and Stonewalling) and guides you step-by-step through the antidotes (Gentle Start-Up, Taking Responsibility, and Physiological Self-Soothing).. . 0:00 – Introduction to Gottman’s 4 Horsemen. 1:10 – Chart of Gottmans 4 Horsemen with their Antodotes. 1:39 – When the Antidotes Don’t Work. 3:23 – How Arguments Escalate . 5:15 – The Attack/Defend Communication Cycle. 9:27 – Criticism. 14:18 – Group Exercise #1 Turn Criticism into Gentle Start-Up. 17:00 – Defensiveness. 20:36 – Group Exercise #2 How to Respond to Criticism. 22:07 – Contempt (Biggest predictor of divorce). 24:00 – Why Laura Disagrees with the Gottmans. 25:41 – Contempt doesn’t have an antidote. 27:07 – Stonewalling. 29:08 – Pursuer/Distancer Pattern. 30:42 – Antidote to Stonewalling. 31:41 – When timeouts don’t work. 35:30 – Time-Out Cheat Sheet. 36:06 – Group Exercise #3 Self-Soothing Idea Brainstorm. 36:30 – Review of Gottmans Antidotes. . Drs. John and Julie Gottman are most famous for their ground-breaking research which has been shown to predict relationship dissatisfaction and divorce with 90% accuracy. Laura Silverstein, LCSW is a certified Gottman couples therapist who has been using this model in her office to help her clients for 18 years. . . Each of Gottman’s 4 horsemen has an antidote which helps couples with the following challenges:. . How to speak up about what you need without being critical. How to respond to criticism without being defensive. What to do if there is contempt in your relationship. What to do if one or both parties shuts down during an argument. . Ms. Silverstein has been using these strategies and adjusting them according to the results she sees in her office. This video includes the Gottman’s advice about how to handle the four horsemen as well as her own personal adjustments to the model. We hope you find it useful.